Looking back to childhood, why is it so much easier to see all the bad over all of the good? It's like when some is wearing a crisp, clean new shirt and all you can see is the stain on it's collar. I could tell you, off the top of my head, 10 things that my mom did that embarrassed and upset me when I was an adolescent, but have to think long and hard to remember the good things.
I had a mom that made play-dough with us, let us decorate our own cookies, stayed up all night to make new curtains for our rooms out of fabric especially picked out to match our personalities and interests, took us on spontaneous trips to the park, never bought herself anything so that she could buy more things for us, and let us get away with much more than we should have gotten away with. Yet I look back and remember all of the bad things.
I always needed someone to blame for my problems, and she was so convenient. She had problems, addictions. She had ups and downs.
I didn't have a perfect childhood, but it was far from being bad. I want to concentrate on all the good memories I have; all of the many happy times.
My mom hasn't had a drink in over a year. My mom hasn't smoked a cigarette in 7 weeks. This may not seem like much, but it is. I'm so proud of her... so ashamed of how I used to think about her and treat her. But I was young, and I can't judge myself too harshly for it.
My mom helped shape me, and I love her. She's not perfect, but I love that about her.
Me!!
haha... I dunno
My son!
Future model/muscian
Me again
Not impressed? Well you should be!
5 comments:
beautiful. ***tear*** i don't know if i've ever met your mom b4. surely i have... its been so long i cant remember. have a good week TRINA!!!!!!!!!
I love you babe!
-L
Thanks for sharing Trina. You are right on when you say that your mom has the best of intentions. Sometimes that is just hard to see. My mom and I had a hard time of it when I was engaged and first married. Its still taking time to heal wounds that run deeper than I thought.
Emily said something that I think makes a lot of sense...mom ALWAYS has had the best of intentions...regardless of whether those intentions where always what we thought were best...but, I still never went to any friends house where their moms made them curtains, cooked them dinner, did their laundry, and even when they are 20 something with 2+ kids, take care of them like they were 10. She is fantastic, and more than anything, she gave up her entire life, no school, no job, no hobbies, no new clothes, no new cars, so that she could care for us. Now, she basically does the same thing so that she can care for her husbands mother and father, and for her multiple grandchildren. She is an amazing woman, flaws and all....and to think of all the self-improvments she's made in the last few years...
ReAnne
This one made me cry. I know I really took my mom for granted when I was younger and I've really tried to do better. I love your mommy too I remember one night she let us make peanut butter cookies and it was really late. Your a good mommy too I love you!!
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